For Shaneka Carrotheis, mother of two from Little Rock, her day begins like most mom’s. She wakes her kids up and gets them to school. For Carrotheis though, she doesn’t see her kids in the afternoons when they get home. Working evenings, most nights she comes home exhausted and ready for bed. She stresses about feeding her kids and helping them get their homework done. She comes home just in time to see her oldest child, but her youngest is already fast asleep. For single mothers, this is their reality.
Carrotheis knew she couldn’t parent alone, she needed support and community. In 2014, Carrotheis learned about the Arkansas Dream Center through her oldest child’s teacher. She encouraged Carrotheis to enroll her kids in the Dream Center’s free after-school program so they would receive dinner and tutoring while she was at work. For Carrotheis, the Dream Center lifted every day burdens for her so she could focus on being a mom.
“As a mom, the Dream Center is very helpful. If I need to work in the afternoons or evenings, I don’t have to worry about my kids being at home by themselves. They help with homework, provide counseling, make holidays special and meet the needs of whatever I might need at home,” Carrotheis said.
Not only has the Dream Center blessed Carrotheis, but also her kids. It is a place where they are encouraged, supported and loved.
“My kids love the Dream Center. I don’t worry about them when they are not around me because of the relationships they have with the staff and the uplifting environment that is fostered,” Carrotheis reflected.
Single motherhood has taught Carrotheis to be present. What has been most important to her is that she shows up for her kids and reminds them just how much she loves and believes in them.
“Being a single mom is challenging. I love it though and would not trade it for the world,” Carrotheis said. “As a family, we have our good days and bad days. Being a single mom makes me go harder for them. I have to make sure they have everything they need.”
Carrotheis knows as a mom, she has to stay positive. In a world where her choices are judged, an uplifting and supportive community is needed.
“I don’t want others to make me feel bad for decisions or choices that I have made that are out of my control. For women that are single moms, we need positivity,” Carrotheis reflected. “We don’t need negativity as we are navigating motherhood alone. I try to keep negativity away because I don’t want my kids to see my hurt and pain. As a mom, you have to decide what’s best for you and your family.”
For Carrotheis, motherhood requires strength- especially when doing it alone.
“Being a mom requires being strong for your kids at all times. I love motherhood. Experiences I didn’t get to have with my mom because she had me so young, I get to have with my kids,” Carrotheis said. “I wouldn’t trade this job for anything. Being a mom means everything to me. I couldn’t live without my kids. Being a mom is worth it.”
